The word that best describes Day 2 is “diarrhea.” No joke.

Metformin is a useful medication for people with high blood sugar, but it also comes with some side effects while your body gets used to it. For me, those side effects manifested themselves as an upset stomach and diarrhea. Really bad diarrhea. The kind that wakes you up every hour at night. The kind that sounds more like urine when it’s coming out. The kind that forces you to call off work for fear of shitting your pants during your commute. This wasn’t just “some loose stools,” as the doctors try and describe it. This was, “Holy shit, I have to actually squeeze my butt cheeks together because I am literally going to shit myself. What is going on right now?” kind of diarrhea.

I knew about these side effects, so I wasn’t entirely shocked when they set in on me to ruin my day. However, I did not expect them to keep me awake at night, or make me doubt myself every time I thought I needed to fart. I know, kinda gross, but it is what it is, and this is what I was dealing with. I called off from work after a restless night of feeling sick. I also called Dr. K to ask if I can lower my dose to avoid this problem while I get used to the medication and she approved. So, instead of taking 500mg twice per day, I am taking 500mg once per day (at night). Let’s hope this helps me trust my rear end again.

By 10am I was feeling much better. I ate breakfast (3 fried eggs over a mixed veggie stir fry cooked in butter, also had some coffee with cinnamon in it). Sometimes staying home from work when I am not bedridden leaves me with anxiety about all the work I am not doing while at home, so I showered and got myself to work. It ended up being a really productive day and I solved a few issues that had been plaguing my team for the past couple of weeks. I skipped lunch and just had a snack of 2 hard boiled eggs and a stick of string cheese. After work, I headed to my favorite Korean spa in Koreatown and had a body scrub after soaking in the tubs and sitting in the steam room for about an hour. Of course, after shitting my brains out all night and not eating lunch, I was starving. I caved and ate bibimbap, which is basically rice, and felt a little guilty about it until I reminded myself that some days are going to be like this and I hadn’t failed so much has slightly veered off course.

At the end of the day I felt pretty good. I felt relaxed from the spa and, even though I hadn’t stuck with my low carb diet in the way I need to, I had at least taken all of my vitamins for the day and found the time to think deeply about a few things and just chill. Sometimes being able to relax deeply is the most healing thing you can do for yourself, especially when the day has been rough enough without the stress of overthinking every meal.